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Even the scrolling system appears designed to irk. Spelunkerbound.Ĭontempt for the player spews forth from the opening seconds, with unforgiving jump mechanics designed to turn perfectly innocuous-looking leaps into death traps.Įven with the new 'Rope Assist' switched on (an option you can employ to negate one of the more hateful causes of death), you'll still contrive ways to be caught in the splash damage from a bomb, or fall into a pit, or catch falling debris from passing bats, and so on. While Bounty Bob and Donkey Kong still feel a joy to play today, this feels like a relic best forgotten.ĭeath is literally everywhere, with every tiny infraction resulting in petty, unnecessary punishment - and progress requires a steely commitment bordering on the obsessive. Massive oversight or lucky escape? Coming at it without 20-20 hindsight, it's hard to say with any certainty, but one thing's for sure: Tim Martin's fondly remembered platformer has aged with all the grace of a horny, crack-addled pensioner.Įxperienced 28 years after its release, Spelunker is saddled with some of the most spiteful, antagonistic mechanics in the long, glorious history of platform gaming.

NES version available via Wii Virtual Console.ĭespite being aged 138 and serving in both World Wars, Spelunker is one of the few platforming hits of the past to have completely passed me by.

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Working your way up the food chain involves a fair bit of button mashing, sure, but once you gain access to the chargeable attacks and nauseating power-ups (such as the self-explanatory chunder cheese and the flame fart attack of Napalm Chilli), an unexpected layer of strategy makes it more entertaining than seemed possible early on.Īs a freebie to PlayStation Plus subscribers, Me Monstar Hear Me Roar is a cackling feast of projectile-vomiting silliness to while away an hour on, but you might balk at having to actually pay for it. What the game lacks in subtlety, it makes up for with brash energy, slick production values and surprisingly moreish mechanics.

But while bigger monsters lumber around, you have to continually boost and barge your way around, shout to stun, and lay into them with your punch attack whenever the opportunity presents itself. On a basic level, the more you eat, the bigger you get. Doing so involves a mixture of canny melee moves and a continually scooping up all the 'dreams' that float around the environment. On each level, you begin as a slight blue-skinned beast on a mission to become big enough to consume everyone around you. It's a mindset that a growing portion of our Super Size Me society appears to be entirely comfortable with, and it's the gluttonous conceit behind Cohort Studio's eat-'em-up.

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PSN Minis - £3.99/€4.99, free to PS Plus subscribers until 2nd August.Įat.

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